Thursday, December 31, 2009


So, I am closing out the old year, which was a bit of a bitch, with a few words on friendship. My definition of a successful life is now simple: do you have "go to the well" friends? That term was one I learned from my mom and it means sometimes things get a little rugged, like Native Americans are shooting at you and yet you still have to leave the fort and get water. Never mind it was their land to begin with, when you have to leave the fort, you need "go to the well" friends. Now, I don't know if they are back at the fort shooting or if they are running like hell beside you but either way...

This year, I had to leave the fort. I had friends who did it all, no matter how small or how outrageous the request. Here is my list which I know will in no way be all inclusive:

Go to the Well Friends

1. Drive over in a snowstorm to bring a friend cranberry vodka that took three weeks to make. Throw in some lobsters to boot.

2. Bring food, pick up kids from school, take kids to karate and daisies, take games to school, and make your friend believe that it is no big deal to do this the week before Christmas. Put together a schedule for people who are delivering food to your friend. Give them some tips that make your friend's life much easier.

3. Fly across the country to manage it all (thanks Mom and Mary)

4. Look through some old photos, scan them into the computer, and put together a slide show that will remind your friend of her history and yours.

5. Bring your friend clothes when she has to stay, against her will, in the hospital overnight.

6. Accompany your friend and her daughter to the American Girl Doll store during vacation week in case she faints from over-consumerism...then let her shop at Anthropologie while you keep two 7 year olds from juggling glittery things. Don't point out the irony of her thinking that the doll clothes were expensive, while picking up three items at her store.

7. Make your friend feel that it is no big deal to throw up in her bathroom...yikes!
8. Drive 45 minutes before Christmas to hand deliver a heart ornament with a band-aid.

9. Check on your friend while you are traveling in Thailand and/or India.

10. Bring your friend beautiful flowers, candy canes, gift certificates to restaurants, craft stores, books, and magazines.

11. Get your friend an Iphone and then offer to provide technical support with no attitude (thanks honey)

12. Sit with your friend's husband during the surgery and then send a fabulous book entitled "Ether Day."

13. Email, send cards, and call your friend just when she needs it most

14. Hang out on your own during Christmas so your friend isn't without support (thanks dad)

So, as promised, this is the last sentimental post for awhile. I am humbled by it all and have faith that I will return the good karma. Happy New Year.


  1. Thank God it's the last sentimental post - here I am crying again! I'll speak for myself in saying it was all worth to see you looking happy and healthy today. I'll accompany you to the well or cover your back (you run faster cause your legs are much longer) anytime, just as long as you keep on coming back to the fort in one piece.
    Happy New Year!

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  3. My comment didn't translate well, let me try again:
    <3, (heart)
    <3, (heart)
    <3, (heart)!!

  4. And you, my friend, deserve each and every bit of that kindness! Shall I add that said friend (who just underwent heart surgery) in turn spends a portion of her Christmas Eve finishing a knitted gift so her last minute friend can wrap it in time for Christmas. It's just one big happy karmic circle! And, I'd go to the well any day for you.